today I skipped philosophy bc obvious reasons (such as it is a philosophy course) and I have that class in the same building as my history class right after that so I’m doing my thing (walking) when I spot my philosophy professor doing his thing in the opposite direction so I pull out my phone and pretend I have an urgent text and keep my head as low as possible and then I remember that I’m in college and my professors won’t hunt me down if I skip class so I made eye contact with him like sayin “hey there party person just doing my thing! Isn’t life great” but now I am dying on the inside just slowly decaying

40,442 plays

radtracks:

TAKE ME TO CHURCH // hozier

Take me to church
I’ll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies
I’ll tell you my sins and you can sharpen your knife
Offer me that deathless death
Good God, let me give you my life

sapphicdalliances:

the world is incredible. there are girls in this world, and there are also dogs. you can put melted cheese on any type of potato.  sometimes flowers grow even when nobody is there to water them. right now on this same planet where we live there are people who are in love with each other kissing each other on the nose. emotions and colours are both things that exist. everything is so great

strawberry-taffy:

my tiny worrisome asian mother strikes again (part 1)

officialunitedstates:

me at the club picking up girls:  hey how are you doing.  I would ask for your number but I already know it.  you’re #1.  I’ll call you later

literallyleslieknope:

I’m so glad this infographic exists.

literallyleslieknope:

I’m so glad this infographic exists.

daytimeblogger:

elysedc:

The ultimate dad joke compilation

what a country

littlegracenote:

where can i buy this

chickensnack:

TUESDAY AGAIN NO PROBLEM

koobaxion:

Man okay when I got my wisdom teeth out it was a fucking experience. Before the surgery wasn’t too interesting but as soon as I woke up I saw the nurse next to me and was all like “hey… i think… i died… and now I’m in a parallel universe… and i gotta go back to my house and kill…

hespokeoftoast:

I was not fucking ready

adrians:

adrians:

the best thing about having the house to myself is that I can make breakfast in my underwear

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